Urinating in the street

Urinating in the street has always been a Parisian habit. Visitors may think only bums indulge in street urination. Truth is most Parisian men have at some point indulged in some outdoors peeing.

Street urinating is mostly a nightly activity, usually while at a bar or after leaving a bar. It is for Parisian men a group activity and a real moment of friendship. Most groups are constituted of 2 or 3 Parisian men, sometimes joined by a tourist wanting to live a true Parisian experience. Being requested to be a urinating partner is a very Parisian sort of election that one should appreciate.

Night time urinating usually takes place on a little corner or under a porch. Frequently, when about to street urinate with a person they’ve never street urinated with before, Parisians will first head to the restroom, vaguely see a couple people in there and say ‘This is too crowded, let’s just piss outside’. There is no saying no to such an offer. This is a defining moment for any Parisian friendship.

Some foreigners mistakenly they have Parisian friends. There is no such a thing as a friendship in Paris that has not been sealed with urine on the street.

While doing your thing, it is important to look cool and detached. A usual and always appropriate conversation is to talk about girls inside the bar. Talking about the boobs of girl in red is always a safe bet too. To thank a friend who invited you to urinate outside, you may gently flatter him by telling him that the girl in red, the one with big boobs really wants him. Consequently, you may be invited outside again later in the evening for a follow-up brief on his story with that one girl and a definition of a detailed action plan.

The mise en scène of nightly street urinating is simple: the Parisian will open his legs quite wide when urinating while at the same time looking over his shoulder to see if the police might bust his naughty little Parisian butt. If police indeed catch you, you are most likely, to simply get a warning. For Parisian police officers are just men after all.

Needless to say, urinating on the street is not acceptable for Parisian women. If your female companion finds out you have been urinating on the street, she will most likely call you ‘dégueulasse’ but will deep inside start loving the Parisian beast in you.

Useful tip: Impress your friend while urinating on the street by reminding them that urinating on the street is called ‘délit de miction’.
Sound like a Parisian:
« Putain, viens, il faut que j’aille pisser »

4 replies
  1. Ali
    Ali says:

    Isn’t that why they dump bleach down the steps of the Metro? Day or night Parisian men piss everywhere they can. Isn’t it how they mark their territory?

  2. Fred Rafael
    Fred Rafael says:

    I noticed that in “the provinces” my companions used a special technique for hiding their genitals when urinating in the street. When I tried to emulate them, I urinated all over my hand. So are the provincials superior in this regard, or are the Parisians superior for ignoring such a useless skill?

Trackbacks & Pingbacks

  1. […] http://www.o-chateau.com/stuff-paris…he-street.html A funny article about an old Parisian tradition of public urination. Alas, Fernand Braudel and Jacques Le Goff told me nothig about that, so I was pretty unprepared to this tradition. The smell really shoked me, though I got used to it on the third day. Maybe the should reduce the high prices for the hotels? In those hard days of financial crisis I sometimes think about staying home instead of spending my money of smelling some piss. […]

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