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Parisians are guilty by essence.
Guilt is a Parisian’s closest companion.
Parisians like to feed their good old friend guilt. Unconsciously most of the time. But even, at times, in a perversely conscious manner. The toy of choice for Parisians to pet their guilt is not sex. It is Le Moelleux of Chocolat. Le Moelleux of Chocolat is pure indulgence. The ultimate form of chocolate-based pleasure. An irresistible mix of mostly chocolate, butter and sin.
Parisians all love their Moelleux au Chocolat. Every restaurant in Paris carries a Moelleux. It has become a Parisian obsession. A discharge system for all frustrations. A deep hole to jump into blindly.
Le Moelleux is dark, sweet, warm and runny. It is an orgasm crowning Parisian dinners.
All Parisians feel bad about ordering their Moelleux. Most usually handle guilt leaks at the moment of ordering it with a “La Vie est courte” or a “Allez hop, un petit plaisir”. Phrases Parisian men would surely like to hear more often.
Eden’s Garden had the apple, Paris has the Moelleux.
Le Moelleux is such a synonymous of forbidden pleasure that most waiters now offer two spoons when the Parisian orders a Moelleux. Against all odds, at that very moment, Parisian waiters become sympathetic. Their legendary coldness is broken down. The weight of guilt on the Moelleux-eater is too vertiginous. He needs help. He needs another spoon. Even the chef tips in, by frequently adding vanilla ice cream on the plate. Foodies think the vanilla ice cream is a triumphant form of contrast, chaud-froid and black-white all at once, highlighting the brotherly insolence of the silky textures. But no. Vanilla Ice Cream is just there as a relief. It is just there to make the Moelleux-eater feel better about himself. Vanilla ice cream brings the lightness and the freshness. A spoonful of glace vanille, even mixed with a bite of moelleux, is still not moelleux all the way.
Le Moelleux au chocolat is a very accurate emotional indicator. When witnessing someone eating a Moelleux, it is imperative to be quite considerate and delicate with that person. Moelleux-eaters indulge because they need to. Le Moelleux is the French and fattening version of the American hug. These people are in pain. They need a quick fix. But the moelleux, by feeding their guilt will only increase their pain. Niceness is necessary before, during and after a moelleux.
Parisian women are known to be relentless Moelleux eaters. On a date, an observant Parisian can easily anticipate the outcome of this forming relationship. If the girl opts for Le Moelleux, sexual misery will ensue. Parisian women are known not to indulge twice the same night. It will come as no surprise that ever since the introduction of Le Moelleux in Parisian restaurants, sexual activity in Paris has plummeted.
Useful tip: A restaurant with no moelleux on the menu is considered avant-garde in Paris.
Sound like a Parisian: « On se prend un p’tit moelleux ?! ».
NB : Moelleux recipes can be found on my friend David Lebovitz’s site
Tags: Chocolate, Cuisine, Dessert, Moelleux au Chocolat
Each time I read the word moelleux, I felt my resolve not to comment weaken a bit further. Your blog is hilarious, and, speaking as a Parisienne by birth, so so true.
Either in Lisbon, in fancy restaurants, you just can’t not escape. Here in Portugal, we call it “Petit Gâteau” (yes, in French), but it is exactly the same dessert.
Mmmm…Reminds me of wonderful gateau chocolat in Languedoc…
So…in various places you can find the saying “French women don´t get fat”, I saw some books regarding this and Hillary Swank is going to make a movie, so I hear.
Thus I am wondering what does the Parisian man has to say about that:-)
Thankyou for introducing me to this dessert, it was so yum! Luckily I’m not a Parisienne, so I didn’t feel the obligatory guilt which accompanies such indulgence.
You forgot to mention “les moelleux picard” : pure heaven. If you have people over for dinner, they will probably frown if you tell them you bought the dessert. But if it’s “des moelleux d’chez picard” then you’ll immediatly be forgiven.
Corine: Merci, c’est adorable! Moelleux!
Elvira: More guilt… love it!
Linny: I know it sounds completely off the hook, but some French women are actually fat.
Fi: My pleasure
Em: hmm… didn’t know about these ones! Will have to check them out!
The post-modern popularity of le moelleux mystifies me. I’ve been undercooking chocolate cake for years, and getting criticized for doing so. Now, all of the sudden, my horrible culinary skills are the envy of all Paris.
Emma… let me guess: you’re Parisienne!
I full-heartedly agree with you on the sinful qualities of moelleux au chocolat. But, I have never NEVER met a French man who felt guilty about anything. LOL!
Ms Glaze… Why do you bring everything back to sex?! You’re impossible!! True though that it’s really more of a Parisian girl’s feeling!!
Mmmh…Instead of having some vanilla icecream with your Moelleux au Chocolat, when for exemple the wheather is cold and grey, I would advise you to have some “Crème Anglaise”. Moelleux au Chocolat from Picard and a bottle Crème Anglaise from Monoprix Gourmet are the key for a quick but delicious dessert at home!
By the way, I an quite worried : I never feel guilty after eating a Moelleux au Chocolat… I just have to speak with my boyfriend to know if I am a normal person
Ha ha! Another hilarious post, Olivier. C’est vrai!
People should read this.
In Manila, that is called a Skolatina. It can be found in Cyma, a Greek restaurant. It might be a bit “worse” as it’s served with a caramel sauce to go with the cake and ice cream.
I make sure I have at least one friend to share it with, I need to share the guilt! Haha!
Wow. No, wow.
Haha. I was going to eat my third moelleux in two day that I baked (using the amazing choco-raspberry one found on fxcuisine.net). But then I read “the fattening version of an American hug.”
And I knew that was when I had to call quits.
Magalie… Crème anglaise is a killer indeed. Never feeling guilt? Were you not raised catholic?
ParisParfait… merci merci!
Necia… ok!
Stylefle… Chocolate, caramel and ice cream… wow!! That sounds like America almost!!
Christina… Indulge, indulge: life’s short and moelleux are good!!
mmmm….i love it….i want moelleux now !!!!
Make the creme anglaise – so much better when it is made fresh with vanilla beans! Can never find them quite the same in the US, so i just have to make them frequently!
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